Top Ten Things To Do List (Satire): Read Golf Digest

Tonight is yet another exciting Sunday night in which one can't wait to sit by the barns in Boones Mill, Virginia, and gaze up at the stars while swatting mosquitoes.

BTW, we did not go to Indiana for the Final Four, that was an April Fool's Joke, you know that right?

Here is a satirical look at what needs to be taken care of this upcoming week:

1. Get the current issue of "Golf Digest"

2. Actually play a game of golf, or at least, indulge in some Putt-Putt...

3. Go to Bethesda, Maryland, to visit F. Scott Fitzgerald's grave (center image)

4. Call "The Atlanta Journal-Constitution" to ask for today's Sunday paper even though I reside 7.5 hours away (the Atlanta Braves start baseball season tomorrow.....we think)

5. Mapquest directions to Omaha, Nebraska, to see an Omaha Storm Chasers game even though I live 18.5 hours east of there.

6. Play Donkey Kong for 9.5 hours at one time

7. Watch the entire first two seasons of "Doctor Who"

8. Laundry

9. Recycling

10. Oil Change

https://www.facebook.com/omahastormchasers

http://www.fscottfitzgeraldsociety.org/

http://www.bbcamerica.com/doctor-who/

http://www.ajc.com/

http://www.golfdigest.com/

Highlight from the Things To Do List: Go to the Local Art Museum

As I try to do every month, I put together a list of 100 Things To Do. It should be pointed out that while I respect religious people and Elvis Presley fans, I am posting this image to be ironic. Hopefully, our followers in the Czech Republic get the joke.

Here we go:

1. Visit the local art museum (yeah, that's another reason for the velvet Jesus and Elvis painting)

2. Looking into getting a Facebook page for the family business

3. Read "The Atlantic"

4. Read "Rolling Stone"

5. Read "The Week"

6. Cancel some magazine subscriptions

7. Read "The Nation" at the Salt Lake City* Library

8. Read "The National Review" at the local library to get into the right-wing mindset.

9. Do the laundry

10. Recycle

Things To Do List: Go the Car Wash

Here is the latest entry in our semi-regular Things To Do List, yes, there are actually more important things we need to do, but we don't feel the need to disclose those publicly:

1. Listen to WUVT (90.7-FM), the student-run radio station of Virginia Tech

2. Wash car...........and, the clean the inside...........then, clean the trunk

3. Yoga?!

4. Recycle

5. Wash Dishes (of course)

6. Go the opera (the reason for the middle image, though we are not going to see 'Otello')

7. Watch the three episodes of "Mad Men" that you've taped

8. Wear the Batman tie; it could possibly help you with girls

9. Go through the comic books and price them

10. Possibly give money to local PBS station to prevent it from going blank (yes, that's the reason for the TRT_ Turkey Radio Television_ test pattern)

http://www.wuvt.vt.edu

http://bikramyogabethesda.com/

http://www.lyricopera.org/

http://www.unctv.org/content/

http://www.trt.net.tr/anasayfa/anasayfa.aspx

The links are for 1) WUVT-(90.7 FM); 2) Bikram Yoga Center in Bethesda, Maryland (near Wash. DC); 3) The Lyric Opera Company of Chicago which is performing "Oklahoma"?! in May; 4) WUNC-TV, the public television station for all of North Carolina; 5) The official site for the TRT which is in Turkish, of course!

Highlights from My 40 Things To Do List

Those of you who are jumping from our sister blog "The Daily Vampire" are perhaps more keenly aware than the rest of you about what I am doing here. Yes, I am simply posting things from an actual 40 Things To Do List that I made yesterday. Hopefully, at least six of the things will get completed!

Hopefully, you can also match the item posted with the proper image. The clothes line is from a couple (I presume they are Americans) who decided to get away from it all and go to Mexico. Hmmmm....yes, I hope they don't get held hostage by armed drug gangs either!

Here are highlights from the mega-list; the number in parantheses is where the item actually was on the real list:

1. Copy resumes (#10)

2. Go to Sweded Film Festival at the Shadowbox Cinema (#19)

3. Oil Change (#20)

4. Laundry (#21)

5. See the Henrik Ibsen play at Triad Stage (#25)

6. Write a piece of flash fiction, whatever that means (#27)

7. Try to get more organized (#37)

8. Find missing headphones (#35)

9. Take a very long walk (#39)

10. Listen to BBC (#40)

Top 10 Things To Do List...During My Week Off

Yes, we are quite behind on our blog posts. As most of you who follow us know (yeah, I know this blog only has one official blogger), this blog as well as our sister blog "The Daily Vampire" has a different entry for each day of the week.

The top 10 lists were supposed to be posted Saturday, and we've omitted a few 'missing entries' so we aren't working on this until 3 a.m. Altoona, Pa., time tonight.

Here is the week's to-do list for my week off:

1. Plan Chapel Hill trip

2. Take Gizmo to the vet

3. Try to see old driver's ed films

4. Actually do work for work?!

5. Wash car (pictured, not me!)

6. Listen to college radio stations online

7. Laundry (what else?!)

8. Read Martin Amis novel from the library

9. Start the exercises!!!!!!!!!!!

10. Learn a catch phrase in Urdu......

So much for the promised six-day hiatus!

At any rate, here is my weekly top ten list, which this week is simply a to-do list:

1. Wash Car

2. Pay Rent

3. Buy Christmas gifts

4. Swim at YMCA

5. Pay Other Bills

6. Help Mom with Antiques Show

7. Write a Short Play

8. Send Christmas Cards

9. Buy Groceries

10. Don't Go Insane!

UPDATE (12/12): So far, I have managed to do all these things except stay sane and buy Christmas presents.