10 for 10 (8th Entry): The First Line of the Novel 'Choke'

Greetings to our blog readers in Macedonia, Belgium, and Jordan.......in order to substantially increase our global audience we will name drop Serbian soccer player Branislav Ivanovic of Chelsea and German striker Mesut Ozil , who is of Turkish heritage, for Arsenal.

Tonight actually marks the 10th anniversary of our first blog entry here on this blog, to our knowledge only four or five people read that one. Hopefully, at least 98 will read this entry (nudge, nudge, wink, wink....)

On a personal note, we want to send our kudos to Chris Hurst, the 11:00 news anchor for WDBJ-7 in Roanoke, Va. If you watched CNN a few weeks ago, you saw him speak with Anderson Cooper, he has been through a lot. Tonight marks his second week of returning to the broadcast booth. Since Roanoke is our hometown, we wish Hurst the best.

We were hoping a joke about Scott Walker, the Wisconsin governor who dropped out of the Republican presidential candidate race, but we are running late, and you can see the tweets of his former employee Liz Mair, which are indeed quite amusing.

Tonight, we are going retro with the first line of Chuck Palahniuk's great 2001 cult classic novel "Choke." A few years ago, we had lots of fun with posts about the first lines of novels, such as Leo Tolstoy's "War and Peace," which we must profess to have never read!

Here is the first line from "Choke:"

"If you're going to read this, don't bother. After a couple pages, you won't want to be here. So forget it. Go away. Get out while you're still in one piece. Save yourself."

http://chuckpalahniuk.net/

Comic Strips Survey Sunday Roanoke Times (Jan.11th): Stephan Pastis Wins Again

Greetings to our blog readers in Belgium, the great country which has brought us Asterix and Lucky Luke (just kidding, we know those are French comic book characters and that, of course, Belgium is the home of Tintin).......

Today, we once again give you our ten favorite Sunday comic strips, this time from the Sunday "Roanoke Times;" Stephan Pastis once again delivered the goods in "Pearls Before Swine," with a hilarious take on how Zebra, one of the title character, got his dad the epic Ken Burns PBS documentary on the Civil War, and his dad was unable to figure out how to use a dvd player. We are using an image of Stonewall Jackson (on top), a Civil War general for the Confederates, for that strip.

Yeti the Snowman which one might see in Nepal (well, maybe not) is our center image. In Dave Coverly's single panel strip "Speed Bump" a woman is sitting beside Yeti in a doctor's office waiting room; we imagine Yeti was perhaps reading "National Geographic" or "Afar"....well, maybe not!

And, lastly, we go with a Simaese cat in the bottom image for "Get Fuzzy," which once again proves that cats and dogs are basically the ones controlling our lives.

Here is the top ten:

1) Pearls Before Swine #

2) Speed Bump #

3) Get Fuzzy #

4) Garfield #

5) Doonesbury #

6) Agnes #

7) Dilbert #

8) Non Sequitur #

9) Zits *

10) Jump Start #

#-Go Comics strip

*-Comics Kingdom strip

http://www.gocomics.com

http://www.comicskingdom.com

 http://www.roanokedoesntsuck.com

http://www.nationageographic.com

Presidential Quotes (13 of 16): Richard Nixon

Today, we quote our personal favorite Republican President, Richard Nixon (it should be pointed out that we are Democrats here). One can visit the Nixon Library Museum in Yorba Linda, Calif.

A poster of Nixon bowling in the Coen Borthers film "The Big Lebowski" has also become a part of pop culture. And, a Lebowski Fest will be taking place in Tampa, Fla., from Jan. 31-Feb.1, 2014.

But, before we quip Nixon, let's throw in one from Al Capone in the hopes that it will increase our hits from Belgium and Slovenia: "Capitalism is the legitimate racket of the ruling class."

Here is our quote from Nixon: "Only if you have been in the deepest valley, can you ever know how magnificent it is to be on the highest mountain."


http://www.nixonlibrary.gov/

http://www.nixonfoundation.org/

http://www.lebowskifest.com

Quotes from American Presidents (2 of 16): Theodore "Teddy" Roosevelt

Greetings to our blog readers in Salt Lake City, Boston and Miami here in America, and to those of you in Lebanon, Belgium and Guatemala.

Our quote today is from Theodore Roosevelt, who is considered to be the most liberal Republican president in history, and thus he has admirers on the right and left. Sen. John McCain (R-Ariz.) got in trouble during a campaign rally in Virginia Beach, Va., when he ran against George W. Bush, when he said that he wanted the GOP to more like 'Teddy Roosevelt's party than Pat Robertson's party.'

Teddy is also a popular Washington Nationals (baseball team) mascot. Since he did win a running of the mascots until the season prior to this one, a blog entitled "Let Teddy Win" was launched and its popular has gone beyond the Washington, DC, metro area: http://www.blog.letteddywin.com

Teddy has been played on film by many actors, most recently Robin Williams. And, there at least six high schools named after him, including one in Kent, Ohio.

Here is his quote:

"The most important single ingredient of success is knowing how to get along with people."

Image to Fill Space: Uma Thurman for Tell a Woman She is Beautiful Day

This cover of "GQ" actually goes back to 1995 when Uma Thurmas was around 24 or 25 years of age (she was born in November of 1970). Today indeed is Tell a Woman She is Beautiful Day. We imagine this post will probably get few hits in Iran or Afghanistan, but hopefully we will get more traffic from France and Belgium; it's all good!

Presidential Quotes: James Madison

Greetings to our blog readers in Belgium, Portugal and New Zealand, today's quote comes from James Madison, the fourth president of America and an author of the U.S. Constitution. James Madison University in Harrisonburg, Va., is named after him, and he is frequently discussed on the public radio program "Your Weekly Constitution" ( http://www.montpelier.org/center/radio ) produced at WETS-FM in Johnson City, Tenn. (http://www.wets.org)

His home Montpelier in Orange County, Va., is also relatively close to Monticello, the mansion of Thomas Jefferson, America's third president, in Charlottesville.

Here is Madison's quip:

"If Tyranny and Oppression come to this land, it will be in the guise of fighting a foreign enemy."

http://www.jmu.edu

http://www.montpelier.org

Happy Children's Day, It's a National Holiday in Turkey

We are wishing everyone in Turkey a Happy Children's Day. 23 Nisan/April 23rd was first recognized by modern Turkey's founder Mustafa Kemal Ataturk in 1920.

While figuring out which image to use, we stumbled across an image of this children's magazine with the Smurfs on the cover.

It was through another children's magazine "Tercuman Cocuk" (Cocuk is the Turkish word for children) that I first heard of the Smurfs, which were actually created in Belgium. In early editions, the Smurfs accompanied the Little Prince.

We recently found that particular magazine which came out on Feb. 25, 1978, some ten days before my eighth birthday.

Some right-wingers, perhaps someone like Cal Thomas or Newt Gingrich, has theorized that the Smurfs are a Marxist entity because they encourage community building.

Yeah, we think they are reading too much into it too.

Olympic Cities Destination Quiz (5 of 6)- Helsinki-Antwerp

Hey kids, for those of you who are not sitting at a multi-plex in Pawtucket, Rhode Island, watching "Batman: The Dark Knight Rises," we offer you free entertainment and a geography lesson as we look at the distance between Antwerp, Belgium, which hosted the Olympics way back in 1920, and Helsinki, Finland, which did the honors in 1952.

A mere 29 countries competed in Belgium, but among them was American swimmer Duke Kahanamoku (1890-1968), whew glad, we double-checked the spelling!, who won gold. He would later become an actor and an icon in his native Hawaii.

In Antwerp, Italian fencer Nedo Nadi (1894-1940) won a record five gold medals in his sport.

As for the 1952 Helsinki Olympics, which had 69 countries participating, Soviet/Ukrainian gymnast Maria Gorokhovskaya (1921-2001) who might have the longest surname in Olympics history won an all-around gold medal in women's gymnastics and six medals overall. In 1990, she emigrated to Israel.

So, we are asking just how far apart these two European Olympics cities are from one another; is the answer:

A) 1,061 miles

B) 1,265 miles

C) 1,333 miles

D) 1,409 miles

Note: The above images are of the iconic Belgian comic book hero Tintin and his dog Snowy, and a member of the very unique Finnish band the Leningrad Cowboys.

Congratulations to the University of Alabama for Winning Gymnastics Title

Yes, college gymnastics fans will undoubtedly notice that the headline and the photo of Georgia gymnast Kat Ding, a senior from Sparks, Nev., may not seem to go well, but please read the entry first!

And, before we get to that, I forgot to thank blog readers from Belgium, Portugal and Australia on our sister blog "The Daily Vampire,' in addition to them, I want to thank those of you from Bulgaria and Indonesia who have stopped by here in the last 24 hours.

The University of Alabama did indeed win its seventh NCAA championship in women's gymnastics on April 21, and this was the first time that the Crimson Tide had successfully defended its title.

For Tide senior Geralen Stack-Eaton, it must have been a particularly rewarding weekend for she also won an individual title on the balance beam.

Meanwhile, Ding defender her national title on bars with a 9.875 and she had a 9.995 on floor, which gave her a title on that apparatus as well; Ding edged out Stack-Eaton, the defending floor champ, and Ellyse Hopfner-Hobbs of UCLA, who is perhaps the top Canadian gymnast in the world at the moment.

Kyra Hunter of Florida won both the coveted all-around title as well as an apparatus title on vault. The Gators finished a very close second to the Tide in the team competition with the Bruins of UCLA coming in a close third.

Next year, UCLA hosts the NCAA championships in the sport.

Virtual Postcard from Colorado- Graffiti Van in Denver

We have no idea which graffiti artist performed this radical makeover on this van, but we did learn from our visit to Colorado last week that Denver-area street artist Gamma Agosta has made quite a name for himself. Among his most famous works include one depicting a female Mexican bandit wearing a sombrero with machine guns in her hands and bullets covering her large breasts (hmmmm......I think we just got hit with an 'R' rating! But, we do try to keep it clean here).

Among the things to do in Denver when you're NOT dead (that's a reference to an independent American film for those of you in rural Uzbekistan), we highly suggest a visit to the Clyfford Still Museum, even though many of the great expressionist American painter's works are untitled (which drives us crazy).

But, speaking of people who have literally gone insane, earlier this year, Carmen Tisch, a Denver resident, punched one of Still's famous paintings, done in 1957 and worth $30 million, at the museum.

The dubious incident reminds one of an attack on Paul Gauguin's "Two Tahitian Women" painting at the National Gallery in Washington, DC, in April of last year. According to various media reports, Susan Burns of Alexandria, Va., the culprit in question in the Washington, DC-incident, said Gauguin's work was evil since it featured nudity and that it was 'bad for children.'

Burns later came back to the National Gallery and tried to assault Henri Matisse's painting "The Plumed Hat" in August of last year.

Lastly, we send out a special thanks to blog visitors from Armenia?!*, Belgium, Hungary and Jamaica** for visiting our blog today.

*-Hmmmm......I am a Turkish-American, how is it possible to be more popular in Yerevan than Ankara?!

**-It must have been a rainy day in Montego Bay! 

http://www.gammagallery.com

http://clyffordstillmuseum.org

Casulaties of Modern Technology (9 of 12)_ The Compact Disc

Yes, we are using an image of a compact disc of REO Speedwagon as a bit of an in-joke, as it is a band that one often hears one annoying adult contemporary radio stations, such as WASH-FM (97.1, Washington DC).

The compact disc, which is refered to as the cd, is an optical disc used to store digital data. It was first developed in labs in Belgium and The Netherlands in 1979, according to Wikipedia, and the cd became commercially available in 1982.

The first cd that we personally purchased was "Storm Front" by Billy Joel in 1989; it's the one with "We Didn't Start the Fire," which seemed like such a great song at the time.

As "Rolling Stone" writer Rob Sheffield has noted in his memoirs about his youth and how the pop music of the time ('80s and '90s) affected his life, he noted that the cd was instrumental in allowing music artists to store more music in one unit. Bands, ranging from The Cure to Guns N Roses, have taken advantage of this.

There are also enhanced cds, such as "Naked" (Talking Heads, 1988), which have music videos stored on them in addition to music from the recording studio.

According to a recent "Rolling Stone" article (not written by Sheffield) and the public radio music show "Sound Opinions," sales of cds have been plummeting. But, many are still made in spite of more modern gizmos because older artists like Leonard Cohen, Tom Waits and Bob Dylan rely on cd sales for their older customers whereas young artists like Lady Gaga rely on going directly to I-Tunes and I-Pads, and other gadgets that were the brainchild of the late Steve Jobs.

However, vinyl sales have improved. In fac, 2011 was a banner year for vinyl record sales as 3.9 million records were sold. This was the first in sales in the product since 1979.

And, many though music stores have been disapperaring at an alarming rate, the remaning succesful ones, such as CD Alley in Chapel Hill, Hill, and Wuxutry Records in Athens, Ga. (which also has a store in Atlanta) have relied on both the cd and the record to get music to their customers.

Quote of the Day/Week- Evita Peron

If my dear sister Sibel Isley (not her real name) who lives in Provo, Utah (not her actual place of residence), actually reads this and she is contemplating getting me a very expensive gag gift for my 42nd birthday in March, she may think about getting me tickets for the broadway revival of the 1976 musical "Evita!" in which Ricky Martin will play Argentinian revolutionst Che Guevara (this is NOT a joke).

The show is scheduled to open in March, and Elena Roger, 37, who is actually Argentinian, will play the title role of Evita Peron (1919-1952).

All of this brings us to the subject of our quip today which is from the feminist icon Evita Peron, and ironically the actress who will play her on broadway has already outlived her as Evita died from cancer at age 33.

"Evita" was turned into a 1996 film with Madonna playing the title role. As a Turkish-American, I was amused to see that Oliver Stone worked with Alan Parker, who also directed the film version of "Evita." They had worked together on a film called "Midnight Express," which for obvious reasons (note to the cinematically clueless: the 1978 film does not show Turkey in the best light, and I have called the film blatant, racist trash) is not in my dvd collection.

So, here is the quote from Evita; this month we are featuring quotes from famous Latin Americans on both blogs:

"Answer violence with violence. If one of us falls today, five of them must fall tomorrow."

SIDEBAR ONE: The answer to our Road Quiz entry on Saturday is C) 1 hour, 40 minutes.

SIDEBAR TWO: As an American who is getting into European soccer, I must profess the UEFA Champions League Cup seems a bit confusing. Case in point, the Greek team Olympiacos upset English power Arsenal 3-1 in a game that was played in Greece today, but Arsenal is the team that goes on to the next round, and conversely Olympiacos does not. But, then again, the American college football bowl system even has us wondering what is going on!

Here is a partial list of scores from today's UEFA action; Chelsea, Marseille and Zenit also advance:

Porto (Portugal) 0 Zenit (Russia) 0, tie

Marseille (France) 3 Dortmund (Germany) 2

Olympiacos 3 Arsenal 1

Genk (Belgium) 1 Bayer Leverkhusen (Germany) 1, tie

SIDEBAR THREE: Various media reports that came out today said that Cory Smoot (Flattus Maximus), the guitarist for the head-banging heavy metal band GWAR known for their wild costumes, died of natural causes at age 34 from a coronary artery. Smoot's death occured in early November. The band, which is originally from Richmond, Va., said that profits from their next record "When Worlds Collide" that comes out next year will go to the Smoot Family Fund.

GWAR has also announced through their web site that the scheduled 2012 European tour will continue as scheduled; they first play Antwerp, Belgium, on Jan. 11th; the band will also play Oslo, Norway, which is a surprising hot spot for heavy metal on Jan. 29th.

Whoops, We Forgot Belgium

Well, we are posting this simply to balance this blog with our other blog "The Daily Vampire," where we made an error sending an entry meant for this blog on that one.

But, we were thinking about taking a day off from blogging tomorrow to go wash dogs at an animal shelter in Lynchburg, Va. (that is a joke, but we understand there is a great animal shelter in that city).

Alas, an image we hoped to post of Borat at the rodeo in Salem, Va., which is my hometown, as featured in the film "Borat" fell through in our Kazakhstan entry due to technical problems or perhaps a block from that particular site. (By the way, the answer is B for the question in that entry).

And, earlier today, I was able to name 24 of the 25 cities that have hosted or will host the summer Olympics in mentalfloss.com quiz. We forgot about the 1920 Antwerp Olympics. I have even been to Antwerp, Belgium, (back in 1993) but I completely forgot that the city was an Olympic host. Our apologies to Tintin, and everyone else in Belgium.

Yvonne Tousek, a former Olympic gymnast and UCLA stand-out competed for Canada, who I get to chat with every now and then, competed in the 2000 Sydney Olympics and at the 1996 Atlanta Olympics. She is curently performing with Cirque du Soleil.

I would say that I competed for Turkey (my late father's homeland) in greco-roman wrestling at the 1992 Barcelona Olympics, when I would have been 22 years old, but I imagine the actual members of that team would not care for the joke.

Special Quote of the Day- Voltaire

Since today is Bastille Day in France, the country that brought us Tintin (just kidding, Belgium!), we thought we'd quote from the famous philosopher and plawright Francois-Marie Arouet Voltaire (1694-1778) whom everyone simply knows as Voltaire. And, here is the quote:

"Work saves us from three great evils: boredom, vice, and need."

Of course, he said all this a few centuries before the advent of Facebook and Twitter.

Happy Chanukah from Lolek and Bolek

We're not sure how popular the Polish cartoon characters Lolek and Bolek were in Israel, but they were the only cartoon that was allowed on Iranian television after the infamous Islamic Revolution of 1979.

Like the Belgian comic book character Tintin, the boys frequently traveled around the world in their mischievious adventures, including voyages to the Amazon, the Orient and the American Wild West (ironic considering the cartoon was made during the Iron Curtain years).

I happen to be a big fan of Lolek and Bolek (which I used to mistakenly call Olek and Bolek) because I watched the cartoon quite frequently when our family lived in Czestochowa, Poland, (pronounced Chestahova) when we lived there as my father was working at a steel mill as part of a joint effort with General Electric in 1976.

Czestochowa is a city of 240,000 that is best known for being featured in the religious iconic painting "The Black Madonna of Czestochowa."

Lolek and Bolek were created by animator Wladyslaw Nehrbecki (1923-1978) and the characters were based on his two sons. It is available through Netflix in the United States.

SIDEBAR: Not every theatre in the country is performing Christmas plays, as Playmakers Rep in Chapel Hill, NC, is currently performing the Donald Margulies play "Shipwrecked," an adventure story that takes place in Victorian England from now until Dec. 19.

Quote of the Day- Yves Montand

Ironically, our quote today comes from the much-admired late left-wing French actor/singer Yves Montand who was (ironically, again) born in Italy.

Montand appeared in many classic films around the world, including "Z," "Le Cercle Rouge," "Tout va Bien!" (a Jean-Luc Godard film with Jane Fonda), "Let's Make Love" (with Marilyn Monroe) and "The Wages of Fear."

Here is the quote:

"Pacifists are like sheep who believe that wolves are vegetarians."

SIDEBAR: Today is Belgian Independence Day. The Brassiere Beck, a Belgian place in Washington, DC, is celebrating with a $49 all-you-can-eat buffett today. We have jokingly referred to Belgium as Tintinland on this blog since the country is known for the much-adored comic book character Tintin.