Top Ten Worst Ways to Die

We were suffering from bloggers' block (did I just say that?!), so we are 'borrowing' the Top Ten Worst Ways to Die list today from crunkish.com

Hopefully, an FBI agent won't be knocking on my door in Boones Mill, Va., today with a cease and desist order at 2:45 a.m., when I'll probably be watching something on IFC or PBS.

So without any more yack from yours' truly, here are the Top 10 Worst Ways to Die:


1. Skinned Alive or Flaying: Used by Aztecs in Mexico during human sacrifices, and you thought losing your job at the plant in Ohio that was relocating to Honduras was painful!

2. Decapitation- According to crunkish.com, slow decapitation is considerably more painful than losing your head on a guillotine. We won't dispute that!

3. Hanged, Drawn and Quartered- Apparently this really hurts.

4. Dismemberment- Used in medieval era and some of those "Final Destination" films.

5. Burning- (see Joan of Arc)

6. Poisoning

7. Drowning- Especially if it's forced.

8. Heart Removed from Body While Still Alive- This wasn't ranked higher?!

9. Sickness (ie. HIV, Cancer, really, really bad Pepto Bismol Syndrome)

10. Electrocution- or why I won't be working for Duke Energy or AEP anytime soon!

SIDEBAR: In the WE DON"T RECOMMEND YOU DO ANYTHING THIS BRAVE OR STUPID DEPT., I just sent an email to the Minute Men as in those right-wing whackos who have an irrational fear of Guatemalan pool boys. I said: "Either you are with Obama or you are with Osama" in the email header. Yeah, I'm not expecting a response either!

You can fight the Minute Men by logging on to immigrantssolidarity.org
The San Diego-based organization has a moving quote from Martin Luther King Jr. on its web site: "Never forget everything Hitler did was legal."